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Get it write the first time

Phyllis Humby's picture
Tue, 05/01/2018 - 12:35 -- Phyllis Humby

Moving sucks. Not the part about living in a new place and meeting new people. That’s nice. It’s the ‘getting ready to move’ part that makes you want to rip the Sold sign from the front yard.

If you’ve lived in the same house for more than ten years, it’s already too late to think about a change of address. But after twenty years – hey, are you crazy? And it doesn’t matter how little you think you’ve accumulated over the years, it’s too much. Hubby and I aren’t hoarders. We actually loathe clutter. So moving shouldn’t be a problem. Riight…

Okay, here’s the deal. If you’re moving to a bigger place, go for it. Call your friends, get a truck, pack up, and head out. You can unload, find a spot for everything, and still have time for pizza and beer.

Let’s consider our scenario. Downsizing to an open-concept cozy bungalow. If you’re thinking of doing the same, here’s some advice other than Don’t Bother.

Start purging months in advance. Maybe a year. Attack the storage area first. May I suggest that if it’s in storage, you probably don’t need the stuff at all. Trust me on this. It’ll take a brutal assault to discard, donate, or sell everything you should. At first, you’ll pat yourself on the back for tossing all the broken and outdated junk. That’s not downsizing, sweetie, it’s cleaning out stuff that shouldn’t have been there at all. But, don’t get discouraged. Not yet.

While you’re in battle mode, why not tackle the closet. Better known as the time capsule. I know you loved that dress and you totally nailed it with those shoes but that’s just a memory. Take a picture. I said, grab your damn cell phone and take a picture. Good girl. Now get rid of those outdated fashion bombs.

You know, we could clean out this closet in stages but who has time for that. Here’s what to do. Wade through that wardrobe trove and look for flattering outfits that make you feel good. Ditch the rest. I’m serious. If it doesn’t make you glow, it’s gotta go. Chuck it all, honey. Those pants you kept because you might lose weight, the dress that might come back in style, the twenty-seven clutch bags, belts that would fit better around a thigh than your waist. Purge, baby, purge. Do it and don’t look back. Oh, one more thing. Take those boxes to your donation centre immediately! Otherwise…you know.

If your man is like mine, be prepared for the ‘I’m getting rid of a lot more than you are’ argument. Everything has to be a contest with them. Just smile. They don’t realize you got rid of their fave sweats. Only they went to the trash, not the donation box. Their life expectancy ran out. Get it? Ran out? Sweats? Never Mind. Where was I?

Furniture – you have waay too much. And wall hangings – remember girlie, open concept means fewer walls. Oh, and FYI, donation centres don’t accept family pictures. Who knew. But, seriously, you have to downsize the amount of furniture. Hand down, hand out, sell…just move it before the move. And when you think the furniture you kept will fit perfectly into the new place, get rid of another three pieces – at least. Trust me. And when you rent the right size truck for the move, super size it. You still have a lot more than you think.

When the move is finished, and you look at a basement jammed with boxes of small appliances that you use twice a year, bags of craft items – because this is the year you’ll definitely start crafting – small tables, odd chairs, lamps, and – what were you thinking – a sewing machine, you’ll do what I’m doing. Packing up the car for another donation run.

 

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